Olethea Pimenta • February 9, 2026
I want to ask you to think about burnout differently.
So many times, a client will say, “Can you help me reframe motivation the way we have for other things, so I can get my mindset together?” And my go-to is, “I think you’re pretty burnt out. This is not a motivation issue.”
I can already hear you protesting, saying yes, I am burnt out, but I‘ve been taking it easy, I haven’t been doing much, so it should be better. I took the summer off, and I’m putting my hand up less. Yes, this is doing less, but your nervous system might still be feeling it.
Here is what I want to ask you to think about this differently: When you were growing up, whose nervous system was prioritized in your house?
Even if you think all this talk about the nervous system seems like the new way of talking about mental health, I’m pretty sure you instinctively know the answer to that question.
And I bet it was not yours.
You see, you were in an environment where your nervous system was not prioritized, but instead you had to skillfully maneuver someone else’s nervous system – it could have been a parent, a sibling, or it may have just rotated.
But accommodating other people can become such an automatic habit that it can really wear you out.
The pro of this automatic behaviour is that you might see why you are so skilled at working with difficult people, managing friendships with difficult people, handling difficult assignments. This is training from birth.
The downside is that something so ingrained can really wear down your ability to do anything differently. If you want to work on your burnout, you have to prioritize your nervous system. I can feel you squirm. Yes, this means being able to accommodate yourself over accommodating the other – in your friendships, your workplace and intimate relationships.
If this is something you might like support on, please connect with me for a consult.
